The Return of Sidney Crosby

My thoughts on the return of Sidney Crosby. I actually took half the day off work so I could catch the entire game. Didn't want to miss a minute of Crosday!

The Isles "win" the Sidney Crosby Lottery
When they first announced Crosby would return against the Islanders the only thing that I could think of was the Pittsburgh bench with 4 players on it. You know, last year when the Isles sucker punched Max Talbot and concussed Eric Tangradi and Brent ‘MoFo’ Johnson decided to beat the snot out of Rick Depietro. Yeah that. I mean sure the Isles, who have yet to win an away game this season, seem like a easy win but it made me nervous.

Captain Canada
So I hear this title goes to Ryan Smyth but until BOTH CBC and Versus interrupt regularly scheduled programming to nationally feature Smyth returning from an injury, I will continue to call Sidney Crosby Captain Canada. And I would argue that most of the NHL would too. Yes he’s The Face of The Game but he’s not just the NHL poster boy he is the face of Canada in the game as well. Sure the league is dominated by Canadians but Sid IS this eras Great One. He is Canada’s most famous active hockey player.

The Game
On his first shift he almost gets an assist and on his second he scores. Crosby screamed "FUCK YEAH" and NHL fans everywhere echoed that sentiment. He went on to play seconds short of 16 minutes and get 4 points. More importantly than his large point tally, his presence elevated the Penguins game as a whole. Not only was their much more fire under all their skates but things like their struggling Power Play was improved. Even after such a long absence Crosby showed patience and remained unselfish setting up many teammates including Orpik and Malkin (Malkin numerous times, only one of which he scored on.)

As for contact, Sidney took an easy crosscheck but that was about it. The real test will be when he plays teams with more grit like Montreal or teams with less morals like Boston.

The Take Away
Ovechkin is a lazy douche. Yes, that’s what I am taking away from this. So many people for the last several years have debated who is better Sid or Ovie. Sidney Crosby’s injury left the door wide open for Alexandre Ovechkin to run away with the league. Literally. Ovie could have owned the league in scoring, in assists, in penalty minutes - in ANYTHING. But he did absolutely nothing of value. Nada. Zilch. Zero. Zip.

Let’s face it, Ovechkin has 15 points so far this season. If Crosby averages 4 points a game he will pass that in 4 games. There is no debate. Sidney Crosby is a better hockey player than Alexandre Ovechkin. End of story. The only debate is why. Is Ovechkin simply not as skilled or is he just incredibly lazy. Discuss.
(The answer is both)

Either You're With Him, Or Against Us

The title of my blog seems to be the general consensus of Canucks diehards when it comes to their goalie. You either love him unconditionally and with blinding faith or you’re labeled a bandwagoner, a fake fan and a hockey ‘tard who knows nothing about the Canucks. I have to admit the peer pressure on this one gets to me. I rarely say a bad thing about Roberto Luongo because I love my twitter friends and don’t want to be the kid who has to eat lunch by themselves (or more accurately, eat dinner by themselves at the next tweet-up).

But the night before my wedding last week I had a revelation as I was being teased by my future husband’s relatives (all diehard, lifelong Habs fans). One of his cousins said to me “Do you still believe in your goalie?” And I was honest with him. For the first time out loud I uttered the truth. My answer was “I have to believe in him because he’s not going anywhere.”

The fact is I’m not honestly sure if Roberto Luongo can or will ever win a Stanley Cup in Vancouver. Now before you log off this blog and block me on twitter, I will fully admit that last year he was a beast in regular season. We could not have won the division without him. We couldn’t have had such great comebacks or wins. He isn’t a horrible goalie. He’s not even a mediocre one. I once got into such a heated fight with my now-husband when he said Luongo didn’t earn his Olympic Gold Medal that I slept on the couch. Seriously. But the fact is – if I can reveal my true feelings and not be attacked – I don’t trust Roberto Luongo. I think he’s sporadic in both his abilities and his drive.

Is he lazy? Is he comfortable? Is his skin too thick? My thoughts – No, Yes and Yes. He’s not lazy. He trains hard and works hard. I won’t fault him that. But is he comfortable? Most definitely. He’s got a solid contract locked down with no chance of a trade and a guaranteed, serious paycheck until the end of his career. It doesn’t matter what happens, how many fans rant about him or TSN commentators snark about him, or how many times he belly flops (Example 1001: Malkin’s shoot out goal in the home opener). Lu’s not going anywhere.

As for the thick skin – the only two goalies in the league that are playing in a pressure cooker are Luongo and Price. Habs fans are rabid and merciless. Vancouver fans can be that way too but on top of that Luongo has the pressure of playing on the most hated team in the league and the one voted most overrated by players themselves. He’s got added negativity, pressure and scrutiny so he has to have a thick skin. The problem is I think his skin has become too thick. Every time he’s interviewed after a loss he blows it off BIG time. Like with hurricane wind-like force.

After the game 6 loss in 2010 to the Hawks he said “I don’t know what to tell you. I battle as hard as I can out there you know?” His demeanor was flippant and lackadaisical. His comments since the Stanley Cup game 7 loss have been similar. Stuff like “I’m not going to over analyze things right now. I mean that’s hockey. Sometimes you’re going to win and sometimes you’re going to lose.”

Now here’s some of Ryan Kesler’s comments: “There are no excuses…. We had a chance to put them away in their own building and we didn’t.”

A little bit different. And yeah, Kes is locked into a contract too although not with a No Trade Clause and he also has the sting of an Olympic second best spurring him on I suppose. But either way. Lu too easily shrugs off the failures. It irks the crap out of me. No he shouldn’t carry the entire weight of a loss on his shoulders but he should at least look to be carrying something other than his hair lube.

I really don’t hate him. I am not screaming TRADE HIM. I swallow down the frustration when I watch a goalie like Marc Andre Fleury repeatedly manage drop to his knees to block a shot and not belly flop onto his stomach. REPEATEDLY. Did I mention that – as in more than once…. And I think Luongo CAN lead his team to a Stanley Cup. I just don’t know if he wants to be bothered to do it.

What Can Light His Fire
Ginger Bricks. That’s the answer. AV, who is definitely a big part of making Lu too comfortable, has said he will play Schneider more this season than last. But if he only plays him against the Oilers or the Blue Jackets or other random, no-risk teams he’s not doing Schneids or Lu (or fans) any favors. Cory needs to start in big games. If I had a say, Cory would start every game in the United Center. He’d start in LA, in San Jose and yes, Boston. Give him games against rivals. We all know Luongo is better on home ice so give Schneider the opportunity to be better on away ice.

I’ve been saying it to anyone who will listen – Vancouver has TWO STARTER GOALIES. This is likely the last year we have this advantage – so let’s use it. Play them equally. Lu has proven he is no Carey Price. Where Price turtled under the pressure of a starter quality back-up (Halak), Luongo seemed to get more driven and focused with the emergence of Schneider. This is the only leverage we have – the only way to light his fire. Even he must know that if Schneids out performs him, trade clause or not playing in Vancouver would be unbearable. So throw Schneider out there often and in important circumstances. Luongo, if history remains repeatable, will only get better with the competition.

I think the one thing we can all agree on whether we love Lu or hate him or are ridiculously conflicted over him like I am, is this – Vancouver NEEDS a Cup. If that means sitting a million dollar goalie in a crucial game I'm okay with that. And you should be okay with that too.

It's Do Time, Not Die Time

Dear Vancouver Canucks,

I'm a mix of emotions right now. Good, bad and ugly. I have a feeling you boys feel the same way. So let's vent about the bad and the ugly and have a pity party right here and now so we can move on shall we?

Yes what happened to Raymond was horrible and uncalled for. Yes the referees not calling an interference penalty was complete crap. They totally ripped you off. And yeah, the NHL once again smacked you, Canucks, in the face when they didn't follow up with discipline on Boychuk after what they handed down to Rome. And without a doubt Marchand essentially bitch-slapping Daniel over and over and over because he "felt like it" and the ref only calling a penalty when it was obvious the mentally unbalanced Bruin wasn't going to stop until next tuesday was completely unfair. Humiliating and unfair.

But you know what? Life isn't fair. You know how they say living well is the best revenge? Well in your case, WINNING is your only revenge. So suck up all the crap the league and the Bruins have throw your way and win the Stanley Cup anyway!

Realize this simple fact Vancouver Canucks - you are not any farther away from the Cup than you were Friday night after the final whistle. It's still only one win away. ONE. WIN. That's all.

You did it Friday. I was there. I was the one with the red lettered I Believe In Luongo Sign. Your skill outplayed their brute force. You were faster, smarter and just plain better. I know it feels like climbing a mountain and you're even more battered and beleaguered than you were Friday - but you can do it again. Just once more. Just once more and it's all over. One. More. Win.

Canucks, in Games 1,2 and 5 you took Tim Thomas' sometimes chaotic, mostly lucky (lack-of) style and capitalized on its weaknesses. The fact is he's not confident, he's cocky. There's a difference. The same can be said for the entire Bruins squad - cocky not confident. They're bullies. They're goons. Their fans are cheap and the players are dirty. You can't change that and the NHL certainly won't condemn them for it so just forget about it.

You have to get past their cheap classless moves. Ignore it. Focus on the only thing that matters - that you've reached the end. There is no do-over after Wednesday night. No chance to regroup. No room for error.

You have to be sharp - something that comes easily to you but not the Bruins. They aren't about sharpness or talent. They're about chaos and cheap chances. Don't give them any. Play smart and tight and hard. It's do or die time. And you must DO, not die.

Useless referees and a biased league - so what? You haven't let it stop you all season so don't start now. YOU CONTROL YOUR OWN DESTINY. Never forget that. Wednesday is YOURS to win.

You are back in YOUR house. You are playing YOUR hockey. In front of YOUR fans. It's been YOUR season - from start to finish YOU have OWNED this league. One more win and YOU OWN the Stanley Cup.

I will be screaming just as hard from my couch Wednesday as I was Friday in the stands. And I won't be the only one. You have more people behind you than the media would have you believe, trust me on that. (Yes even you Roberto Luongo. Especially you.)

Do it for Luc. Do it for Hamhuis. Do it for Samuelsson. Do it for Rome. Do it for Raymond. Do it for us, your diehard fans who never give up on you. But most of all do it for yourselves. You've earned it. Now go out there and take it.

Bottom line: you, the Vancouver Canucks, can do this. I believe. YOU believe. Now make it happen!

With all my love, faith and support

Me.

Stanley Cup Final by Numbers

So here we go - The 2011 Stanley Cup Final. The Vancouver Canucks and the Boston Bruins. Let's make the prediction on the winner after some numbers fun, shall we?

• 87 - The amount of years the Boston Bruins have been in the NHL.


• 40 - The amount of years the Vancouver Canucks have been in the NHL.


• 40 - the amount of years the Canucks have been Cupless.


• 39 - the amount of years the Boston Bruins have been Cupless.


• 5 - The amount of times Boston has lost a Stanley Cup final since their last Cup in 1972.


• 2 - the amount of times Vancouver has lost a Cup Final.


• 17 - The number of Canadian players on the Boston Bruins roster. Coincidentally, the Vancouver Canucks also have 17 Canadians on their roster. Ironically American born Ryan Kesler wears number 17.


• 2 - The number of Americans on the Boston Bruins roster.


• 5 - The number of Americans on the Vancouver Canucks. So dear Boston fans, if you chant "USA" at the Stanley Cup Finals like you have been known to do previously, you will actually be cheering more Canuck players then Bruins players so kindly STFU and save yourself the embarrassment.


• 2 - the amount of 2010 Olympic gold medalists playing in the 2011 Stanley Cup Final - Center Patrice Bergeron of Boston and goalie Roberto Luongo of Vancouver both played for Team Canada last year. Coincidentally there are also 2 Olympic silver medalists playing in the 2011 Stanley Cup Final - Center Ryan Kesler of Vancouver and goalie Tim Thomas of Boston both played for Team USA last year.


• 21 - The number of points Henrik Sedin has in the 2010 Stanley Cup Playoffs.


• 54 - The amount of wins the Canucks had in the regular season. Unfortunately, none of those wins were against Boston. We played them once in regular season and lost.


• 18 - The amount of games it took BOTH the Bruins and Canucks to make it to the Stanley Cup Finals. Canucks went to 7 against Hawks, 6 against Preds and 5 against Sharks. Bruins went 7 against Habs, 4 against Flyers and 7 against Tampa. This means, theorectically the Canucks are getting stronger with every series and the bruins are not.


• 63 - the amount of penalties the bruins have taken in the post season.


• 28 - the percentage number (28%) of goals the Canucks have scored on PPs in post-season.


• 61 - the number of Power Play chances the Bruins have had in the Stanley Cup Playoffs to score.


• 5 - the number of power plays goals the Bruins managed to score on 61 chances


• 4 - the amount of facts directly above this one that make it clear that if the Bruins do not play 5-on-5 hockey they will lose the Stanley Cup. (and I'm okay with that).



• And last but not least: 5 - the number of games I think it will take the Vancouver Canucks to win the Stanley Cup Final against the Boston Bruins.

Canucks Love Fest

Last night the Vancouver Canucks won the Western Conference Finals of the NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs. They won in Double Overtime exactly 17 years to the day they won last time. I want to write an insightful, quote worthy blog about this but.... to be honest I am still pretty overcome with emotion and I'm drowning in my fangirlness. I don't care about being impartial or insightful.

Blue Believes In Blue
I'm proud of so many things about the vancouver Canucks right now. It's been a long, sometimes tough journey and even when I started to doubt them - Round 1 against the Blackhawks - they didn't doubt themselves. This I honestly believe made all the difference. They KNOW they can do this.

Eat Your Words Wellwood, Not Cheeseburgers

Maybe Wellwood (or as Bieksa called him The Weasel) was right. Maybe when he was on the team we were afraid to lose. But this year the Canucks didn't treat a single game like it was anything more than a single game. Kesler repeated this to the media a lot - they weren't thinking about the Cup or the Western Conference Finals, just about the game at hand. And it worked. Here we are, Western Conference Champions.

From Princess to King
Kesler last year was one of my least favorite Canucks. I am not going to lie, the proof was in the blogging. I called him Princess Kesler. I couldn't stand all his whining and his diving and his Olympic bitching. I love yappy players but only when they have the skill to back it up - re: Burrows. Last year and previous years Kesler, IMO, was more talk than walk. He was the King of Near Misses not goals. This year... he's not a princess he is a KING. He's still the most passioante player on the ice but he's channelled that passion into determination, drive and skill. He is the heart and the backbone of the Vancouver Canucks.

The Brains
If Ryan Kesler is the heart and backbone of the team the Sedin Twins are the brains. And in previous playoffs - and even the beginning of the 2011 playoffs - they've been MIA. But in Round 2 they started to wake up. By Round 3 against the San Jose Sharks the twins were back to playing like it was just another game in February. In other words, they were spectacular. This is the best thing that could ever happen to the Canucks. They are now a full functioning high performance machine. The twins don't get a lot of credit because they aren't flashy players. They don't give high-profile quotes off the ice and they don't score those crazy Bieksa Bounce goals or hand out Ballard Hip Checks on the ice. But their subtly is what makes them brilliant and breath-taking. That pass from Henrik to Burrows through the five-hole of Niemi will forever be etched in my brain as one of the most amazing hockey plays I have ever seen.

There Is No "I" In Team Or the Word "Canucks"
Last night the Hockey Night In Canada Announcers were waxing poetic about Joe Thornton and his injury. Essentially they were eulogizing him and the Sharks. His injury was - according to them - a devastating loss for the Sharks, one that basically put the nail in their coffin. And that's when I realized that yes, the Canucks have some key players - Kesler and the twins. But they aren't the only players that show up. They aren't the only ones that produce. We're deep. We're resilient. I think we're very blessed that Kesler, Daniel and Henrik have remained relatively intact through the playoffs but I also believe with every fiber of my being that if - Hockey Gods forbid - something took one of them out, our team overcome. Bieksa, Burrows, Higgins, Lapierre, Tanev, Hansen, Tambellini, Raymond - you name the guy he has or will step up in a time of need. We are a team of hard working, skilled players. We are not a couple of stars carrying the hopes and dreams of all. I believe in every single one of our players.

We Are Not All Canucks, But Who Cares?
They naysayers are still running rampant. One of the more ridiculous statements on Twitter - "Canucks only got here because of bad reffing calls" (and they don't mean all those bad calls we perservered through). Luongo still "gets Lucky" and the Sedin twins are still "Useless" to some even though Lu made 54 saves in the last game and Henrik leads the playoffs in points. To all of you who hate us I say - so be it. I have no urge to make the Canucks Canada's team or the West's Team. Vancouver fans have stuck with them thru thick and thin - we shouldn't have to share them now anyway. I'm perfectly happy keeping the pride, love and triumph all to myself.

In The Words Of Whitney Houston, I Will Always Love You
I truly, totally and utterly believe that the Vancouver Canucks will win the Stanley Cup. But no matter the end result, I just want to say here and now that I will always be proud of this season. I will always be grateful to every member of the 2010-2011 Vancouver Canucks roster for their heart and their drive and their accomplishments. I am so happy and proud to be your fan.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much Canucks.

Best & Worst of Round 2

Round Two has come and thankfully gone. Overall it was way too short on the East and way too long on the West. Here are the best and the worst of Round 2 of the 2011 Stanley Cup Finals.

Best Series
For the same reasons I picked Canucks-Hawks in Round 1 as one of the the best series, I'm picking Sharks-Wings for the best of the best in ROund 2. Watching Detroit battle back was not only entertaining but a true example of great hockey and great coaching. I think the Sharks got lucky because Detroit is the team that deserved to win.

Worst Series
Every playoff year at some point the Washington Capitals win this title. This year it was in Round 2. Last year Round 1. It's a good thing they win this because they will never win a Stanley Cup. Not with Bruce Boudreau as the coach or pissy primadonna players like Alex Semin taking up their bankroll and useless ice space in the playoffs. Watchign them fall four in a row to the Lightning was pathetic - and boring. Even I, a true Ovechkin/Boudreay hater, am sick of reveling in their collapses.

Biggest Hero
Pekka Rinne. No his team did not advance but the only reason they survived as long as they did was because he is a freaking superhero. He stopped the best team in the league over and over. He never lost his cool. He never got his feather ruffled despite Ryan Kesler's repeated taunting attempts. He may not have won the Stanley Cup this year (because of his team) but he pretty much earned the Vezna this year.

Biggest Goat
Alexandre Semin. What sealed his deal? For me it was when he got knocked to the ice, didn't get a penalty, and instead of continuing on with the game - like both the Lightning and the rest of the Capitals did - he just stood there and made a pissy face at the referee. Way to go you whiny bitch. The Lightning went on to score. I'm not the only one who thinks he's a overpaid, underproducing waste of NHL space, Team Russia rejected his offer to play for them. None of this should be surprising though, Semin showed his true ways years ago when he tried to bitch-slap his way through a hockey fight with Marc Staal.

Worst Playoff Beard
Logan Couture. I'm not exactly sure what is happening on his face. I'm sure he's a lovely person (I have no idea honestly) but he's not one of hockey's hottest normally. Now, with that sporadic fuzz growing on his face, he looks like a cast member from Napolean Dynamite or an extra in a 1970s After School Special. He looks like he should be leaving the rink in a white polyester pantsuit and a Firebird.

Best Playoff Beard
Kevin Bieksa. He looks like a full-on beast. A full-on, sexy, I'm-gonna-eff-you-up-and-you're-going-to-like-it BEAST. He's one of hockey's hottest normally, and the playoff beard just makes him even hotter.

Uptown Sports, Damian Goddard & Their Anti-Equality Beliefs

I feel the need to blog about the UpTown Sports versus Sean Avery twitter fiasco that is out there. I will try to keep it brief and concise but unfortunately it may be hard. I am not gay but some of my dearest friends are. And civil rights - particularly the denial of them - really makes me emotional.

It's Not About What He Said
Todd Renoylds of Uptown Sports has the right to an opinion - even a bigoted one (we'll get to that later). The issue is not that he spoke his mind. It's that he spoke it from his company's official twitter account instead of a personal account. By tweeting his personal views on gay marriage on a business account - and not apologizing or removing it but instead defending it - he made it his company's stance on gay marriage. It is now a belief that Uptown Sports has made part of it's company's vision and corporate guidelines - at least the public should see it that way. Techinically now they should not hire or work with anyone who believes in gay marriage, as it goes against company policy. To me - and a lot of other sports fans out there judging by online responses - any athlete who stays with a company that makes Anti-Gay marriage views part of their corporate beliefs, is now also saying that they too share that opinion or belief. It's a pretty significant blunder by Uptown Sports. One that reflects 100% on their clients.

Damian Goddard - same difference.
By tweeting his support and his 'God Bless you' on a twitter account with a picture of him at the SportsNet Connected desk and a reference to the company in his bio, he made his employer part of his bigoted opinion and his regilious views. Rogers SportsNet quickly issued a tweet saying Goddard's bigotry does not reflect the views of the company however if he still sits behind that desk tomorrow Sportsnet is saying: We don't agree with him but we don't care that he is a bigot - and the general public thinks he is a bigot - we'll pay him to represent us anyway. THAT would be very bad business/PR. And seriously Rogers Sportsnet, there are a million sports journalists who are better than him. He would not be missed.

Speaking Out About Intolerance is Not Intolerant
There is a significant backlash to Todd Renoylds and Uptown Sports' anti-gay marriage stance. Sure there are some supporters, but the majority of people have called his comment hateful and bigoted. What angers me is the people who then call the act of speaking out against intolerance intolerant. DB posted in the comments over at Puck Daddy the following insight: I find it ironic that the people who call out most for "tolerance" are the most INTOLERANT when someone else has a different opinion and belief!

Todd Renyolds is saying is that an entire group of people do not deserve the same legal rights as he does. That's not just an opinion that is bigotry and it needs to be spoken out against. Speaking out against Todd Renoylds' intolerance is NOT being intolerant.

Dear DB (and other intolerant, intolerance flag wavers) it's as simple as this: The fact is the basic ideology of what Todd Renoylds tweeted about gay marriage is the EXACT same thing as if he tweeted that black people should not be allowed to marry or people with a full of head of hair (aka people different from him) should be allowed to marry.

Renoylds is NOT speaking out against intolerance - he is being intolerant. Gay people having the right to marry doesn't take away from my right as a straight women - or his right as a bald, social media moron - to get married. Giving a group of people the right to sit at the front of the bus does NOT take away another groups right to sit at the front of the bus. Get it?

We're all Bigots, Technically
The dictionary definition of bigotry is the following: stubborn and complete intolerance of any creed, belief, or opinion that differs from one's own.
The dictionary definition of a bigot is: a person who is intolerant of any differing creed, belief, or opinion.
Since the word intolerant is pooping up a lot, the dictionary definition of it: not tolerating or respecting beliefs, opinions, usages, manners, etc., different from one's own, as in political or religious matters; bigoted.

Todd Renyolds does not believe a gays should be allowed to marry and is intolerant to the idea. That makes him a bigot. I am intolerant to the idea that gays are not given the right to marry. Maybe that makes me a bigot too. But as I'm concerned if you are the kind of bigot that doesn't believe that one group of humans has the right to take away or diminish the rights of another group of humans you are the right kind of bigot. Todd Renoylds is not the right kind of bigot.

A Man + a Women Does Not = Sanctity
Tood Renyolds defended his original tweet with this one: But I believe in the sanctity of marriage between one man and one woman. This is my personal viewpoint. I Do not hate anyone.

Let's pretend that the 52% divorce rate in North America isn't reason enough to laugh at his tweet. Let's add a sports twist to this - Tiger Woods. He married a woman - and cheated on her with over 12 women. Does Todd Renyolds truly believe that Tiger did less damage to the "sanctity of marriage" than Doogie Howser would if he married his male partner David Burtka? Please Uptown Sports explain to me how letting Ellen Degeneres marry Portia De Rossi is destroying the sanctity of marriage more than Martin Brodeur leaving his wife for her brother's wife. (Seriously). Danny Briere got divorced but I guess Todd Renoylds thinks because he married a woman it makes the divorce less painful or less tarnishing on the "sanctity' of the institution? Hardly.

Furthermore the word "sanctity" implies there is some sort of holy or religious involvement in a marriage and there no longer legally has to be. Marriages certificates are issued by the STATE you get married in (or the province) not the church you get married in. Also, you don't need a clergyman's signature, a judge will do just fine. The only way Todd Renyolds can claim to believe or want to perserve the "sanctity" is if he tweets he doesn't think gay people should be allowed to get married in a church. Then he could claim to believe in the "sanctity" of the church wedding.
But to tweet they simply can't get married means Todd Renoylds thinks gay people shouldn't be allowed civil rights. You might as well put a pilowcase over your head, Mr. Renoylds - a rainbow one, but a pillowcase just the same.

2011 Round One Playoff Predictions

THE EAST

Capitals – Rangers
On paper this prediction makes me crazy. And to be honest I jumped back and forth with this one. The Caps had the better season. But the Caps always have the better season and are yet to perform at that level in the post. The Rangers work harder and are used to fighting for their lives. Just like Montreal last year, that type of gumption and unrelenting fortitude will undo the Dirty Russian and the rest of the Caps.
Rangers take it in 7

Flyers – Sabres
Flyers will murder the Sabres. They’ve got more talent and experience. Not that I care either way, which is why this synopsis is so short. I refuse to care about the Flyers. I’m hoping if I ignore them, they will go away. (Yes, I’m a 12 year old).
Flyers take it in 4

Bruins – Canadiens
This one is hard for me. According to my Hab-obsessed fiancé, the Canadiens have only fallen to the Bruins 7 of the 24 times they’ve met in playoffs. But my burning concern is Carey Price. He’s been known to turtle under pressure and Halak is not there to save him, or the team when they start slow like they tend to do. But I will throw caution and fear to the wind and go with my fiancé and my other Habs guru – my dad. My dad says Habs in 5 so I say Habs in 5. Let’s hope father knows best.
Canadiens take it in 5

Penguins – Lightning
This one is probably the biggest guess of all, theoretically. The two teams have never met in playoffs before. I know some people are saying it’ll be Lightning because Stamkos and Lecavalier aren’t playing against Crosby or Malkin. But they ARE playing Kennedy and Staal. Talbot and Kunitz and most importantly Marc-Andre Fleury. Penguins have shown all year that they don’t hang their hope on The Kid and Russian Frankenstein and that won’t change in post. They’ll grind and dig and shoot and push and Flower will stand on his adorable French Canadian head.
Penguins take it in 6

THE WEST

Canucks – Blackhawks
First things first, if this was a shirtless player competition, Kesler would annihilate Kane. (See photographic evidence to the right) But since it’s not I have to use different logic and here it is: Canucks aren’t the team they were in previous years – they’re better. On top of that, and maybe more importantly – Hawks are not the same team. Sure they still have Kane and Toews but gone is they’re giant, annoying secret weapon against the Canucks – Dustin Byfuglien. Sure they’ll stick the next fattest person they have in Lu’s face but Lu has tweaked his style, sitting back farther in his crease. Most importantly, the Vancouver Canucks’ mindset is a very different beast this year. Canucks come back from behind, push through bad losses and never give up until the final buzzer. The Hawks, without head games and big fat Buff, won’t threepeat raining on our parade.
Canucks take it (finally!) in 5

Sharks – Kings
This one is simple for me. Sharks all the way. Although they do, like clockwork meltdown at some point in the playoffs, it won’t be against the Kings. The Kings have raw talent in Quick, Doughty, Simmonds and Stoll but the key word is “raw”. LA won’t have the emotional aptitude to be a real threat to a bunch of veterans who are no strangers to this dogfight.
Sharks take it in 4

Red Wings – Coyotes
I want the Coyotes to win this. But they won’t. The Wings have age as both an asset and a deficit. It means they’re like to suffer injury and exhaustion before other teams, but it also means they’re players play smarter than a team stack with youngins’ like the Yotes. Although Coyotes will put up a might good fight because they are young and tough and because they’ve played the Wings in playoffs before. But in the end, even without Zetterberg, the Wings will prevail.
Wings take it in 6.

Predators – Ducks
This is the hardest match-up in the West for me to predict. The Predators are a defensive wall. They shut down and wear down their opponents. The big question is will they be able to do that to Corey Perry, one of the hottest streaking scorers in the league? I say yes. Barely but yes.
Preds take it in 7

3 Things More Exciting than the Canucks - Preds

I’ve been wracking my brain all day long to try and find some really interesting and exciting facts about the Nashville- Vancouver game that occurred last night. But honestly? There isn’t any. The game was, IMO, the most boring one of the entire season.

I don’t want to talk about how the Sedins seem to be in a coma-nap, Kes is slumping, Samuelsson has lost his edge or anything like that. We all know this. It’s not news. And I personally would rather see them play like this in regulation than in playoffs so I say slump/sleep your way through March Canucks, but make sure the alarm is set to wake you up in mid-April. I don't care about the President's Cup. I want the Stanley Cup.

Since the only exciting things I could think to write about the Canucks-Predators game was the ref spraining his ankle and the cute little Maxime Lapierre/Shane O’Brien sandwich that happened in the corner of the boards, I’ve decided instead to write about the Top 3 Things Happening Last Night That Were MORE Exciting Than the Canucks Game

1) Jordan Staal got his hair cut
Yes that’s right. Last night Jordan Staal got rid of all that blonde, crazy winged madness he was calling hair. It’s unfortunate, as I was just starting to become obsessed with it. Staal's hair not only poked and popped it's way through every helmet or hat he wore, it also defied gravity. It stood straight off his head at 90 degree angles (even after 3 periods of sweaty hockey) and sometimes even appeared to actually be growing upward. Anyway, I’m fairly certain that the hairdresser who got to restructure that pretty mess had way more fun than anyone watching the Canucks game.

2) Ovie Tweeted
I followed him because I will follow ANY NHL player. Yes, I’m a twitterwhore. And although the Dirty Russian is one of my least favorite NHLers, I have to say I’m digging all his tweet pics, like the one of Phil Kessel sitting by himself during the All-Star draft. And the picture he tweeted last night of himself and Alexandre Semin celebrating Semin’s birthday – in an empty room with nothing but 3 helium balloons - looked more exciting than the Canucks game.

Side note: Between Ovechkin’s return and Charlie Sheen’s arrival my twitter feed now gives me the heebie jeebies. I don’t follow Sheen but everyone is tweeting his #winning #tigerblood crap so much that I feel like I follow him. If you’re THAT into Charlie Sheen and his f*ed up life philosphies, then get off twitter, go cover yourself in cocaine and sparkles and glue yourself to his vision board.

3) The Leafs beat the Flyers
This is not so much exciting as it is a sign of the apocalypse. But I find it worth mentioning because the monumental event means Canucks – despite being as exciting as a librarian on Ambien – are still first overall in the league.

Here’s hoping that the Canucks drink Red Bull before the LA game tomorrow.

Why Can't Athletes be People Too?

Phoenix Coyotes winger Paul Bissonnette recently made an appearance on Howard Stern’s Sirius XM station on the Scott Ferrell show. He did what any good guest on the Howard Stern Network should do – he talked about getting laid. Yes that’s right sex. With women. God forbid.

As I was driving home tonight I heard Ferrell losing his mind. Now I turned it on in the middle of his rant but from what I can tell after Bissonnette’s honest, refreshing and entertaining interview irate listeners started emailing the Coyotes franchise complaining they were offended.

Can I just take a moment to touch on the fact that if you are listening to the Howard Stern Station and you are offended by words like sex, pussy and tits – you are clearly an idiot. Now let’s also briefly mention that if you spend 20 or 30 minutes of your life composing an email of complaint instead of taking 1 second of your life to put yourself out of your own misery and change the channel you are a self-loathing, miserable, douche.

Now to the real heart of the matter - Paul Bissonnette should not get grief for his interview. Not from the Coyotes or the NHL or fans of hockey. He's not a liability to the league he’s an asset!

Bissonette’s on twitter and, unlike 90% of the other NHLers on there, he’s not afraid to use it. Biznasty2point0, as he goes by, has over 45,000 followers. Ryan Kesler, a forward with the number one team in the league only has 21,000. Michael Grabner a scoring machine and hottest rookie in the league right now has 7,000.

So why does a 4th liner on a bankrupt team in the desert have more followers than NHL poster boys? Because he’s honest and interesting. I started following Biz on twitter because people kept retweeting his tweets and they were funny. I was pleasantly surprised he was an NHL player. And I’m willing to bet there’s a good number of his followers that are discovering the NHL because of Biznasty’s twitter. So you should thank him, Bettman.

How many more cocktail waitresses does Tiger Woods have to bang before we realize that professional athletes who make millions a year are doing exactly what ANY of us would do with that money, talent and fame – enjoying it.

It’s so ridiculous to me that there are still people out there that expect athletes to be these immaculate versions of human beings.

Remember when Tiger Woods cheating hit the media? Remember how he handle it with rehearsed, vague, inoffensive and insincere statements? Remember when David Letterman was caught cheating? Remember how he just went on the air and admitted he’d done it, it was a screw up and his wife was pissed? Did you know David Letterman’s ratings shot up after that?

Clearly people appreciate honesty & candor. So I can't be the only one who realizes that if we not only allowed these celebrities and athletes to be normal human beings but also embraced them for it, we'd all be better off.

The NHL loves Sid the Kid as the face of the sport not just because he’s the best player in the world but because of this squeaky clean public persona. It’s the one part of him I don’t like. I mean, not that I’d kick him out of bed for it or anything, but Sidney’s scripted, bland interviews are not nearly as engaging as Biznasty waxing poetic about girls in yoga pants.

I’m sure Sidney Crosby is an actual human being when the cameras are off. I’m sure he sleeps with women and gets drunk and does all the things that any 20-something male with a giant paycheck and a very pretty face should do. But I appreciate Paul Bissonnette for not being afraid to publicly be what we all know (but won't admit) professional athletes are – women-loving, partying, opinionated, normal people.

St. Louis has Vancouver Singing the Blues

We're Learning to Handle Hiccups
This is one of the key things that has changed in Vancouver's game this season. When we fall behind, we don't immeadiately fall apart. Despite blips... okay fatal flaws... on our PK and Luongo's retro puck handling skills (you know from when he sucked worse than this year) we came back. Canucks didn't give up. Lu shook it off. This is further proof we're not the team we used to be. We bounce back - and it takes minutes, not games. This is a good sign. Yes we lost but the Canucks of yesteryear would have lost by more.

Monkey Stat on our Back
When we started this game in St. Louis we hadn't won a game when trailing after the first 20. We still haven't. I hate stats.

Let's Not Panic
We have to remember that this really is not a big deal. So Bobby Lu's streak ends here. That means we get to see his new goalie mask in action! We're still number one in the league. The LEAGUE people - with 81 points. Philly is 4 points behind us. Also, Canucks lead the league in scoring with 192 goals. In 2nd place is Detroit with 187. I love stats!

D is for Decimated
We lost Alberts - again. With a broken wrist he's out indefinitely. (new twitter rumors say it is not broken although I heard Av say it was in interview) Hamhuis, Ballard and Edler are not set to return any time soon. And now there are rumors of a Salo injury. I hope that's a joke - it sounds like a joke. Av has announced that Yann Sauve is being called up from the Moose. To say we're scraping the bottom of the barrel is probably accurate right about now.

Sauve means Save in French!
Yann Sauve was drafted 41st overall by the Canucks. He's not exactly a two-way defenseman, but he's big and skates well. At this point what else can we ask for? And even if Sauve’s offensive game is not as developed as we may like, his name is French for Save so that can only mean he's going to save us... right? Save us from losing one more. It would be horrendous to slip into 2nd overall. How horrible. Yann, it's all up to you buddy! No pressure. Get it done.

My Canucks 3 Stars of the Game
1) Andrew Alberts because I feel sorry for the big lug. If you seen him and his gimp wrist around Vancouver, give him a hug. Tell him Concretefluff sent you.
2) Bieksa for being a lean mean skating machine who just never gives up.
3) Luongo - also known as Lulongo by stupid American Announcers. Sure he totally shit the bed on the Steen goal but he shook it off and went on to be the main reason the game was as close as it was. Great job Bobby Lu!

2011 is the new 1977

If you watch this week's hockey highlights, 2011 looks more like 1977. I feel like I should be wearing bell bottoms not yoga pants.

Honestly when the Boston-Montreal slamfest happened I was amused. It was unexpected. It was unheard of (in the last 10 - 20 years or so) and it seemed harmless enough. I joked about Johnson and Depietra starting a new trend since they were the first goalies to drop the gloves.

But after the Penguins- Islanders slamfest last night I am no longer amused.

The Islanders took that to a whole new level. And it wasn't pretty. It wasn't classy. It shouldn't be without heavy repercussions.

I get retribution is a part of hockey. I fully understand that it's not going to go anywhere no matter what the NHL does. But just like anything, there is a right and wrong way to handle it.

In the "right" category - the way the Penguins handled the retribution on Steckel for giving Crosby a concussion. They dropped the gloves and duked it out and it ended there. Steckel manned up (unlike Steve Moore way back when) and faced his punishment.

The Isles wanted revenge on both Brent Johnson and Maxime Talbot for the goalie fight and the questionable hit. Fine. So if the fact that the Isles scored 6 goals before the 2nd was over wasn't good enough for them, then engage Talbot in a fight, engaged Johnson in a fight AND THEN MOVE ON.

That would have been the right thing to do and clearly the Islanders - as their season record shows - are all about the "wrong" thing (losing a lot and winning without class).

I don't want to go into all the gory details - although you can find them here and a million other places on the net. Here's what I do want to point out. This is the National Hockey League's opportunity to do the right thing.

The NHL has been acting like a shitty parent. Randomly tossing around punishments with no rhyme or reason. You can't keep blaming/punishing Cooke cuz he's the bad kid but cutting Getzlaf and Steckel and others slack because they're "normally such good boys". A hit that is dangerous is a hit that is dangerous - no matter the intention the injury (and the anger of the team losing a player) is real.

Matt Martin's sucker punch of Max Talbot can in NO WAY be overlooked. The fact that Talbot skated away - unlike Moore - should NOT be a factor. If the league lets the extent of an injury be the leading factor in punishment instead of the dangerous act then it's the same as a judge saying "I know you shot a gun at this guy's face but you missed so it's fine."

The league may want to turn their famous blind-eye to the Gillies hit on Tangradi but they definitely shouldn't ignore the way Gillies kept attacking the guy who was clearly injured and fighting for consciousness. The only thing more offensive and classless than that, is Gillies moustache.

I'm not sure how big a suspension should be handed down to Hayley. The recent AHL call-up was like a rabid dog out there swinging at everything in a Pens jersey. I find it mostly just disturbing that the kid really thought that was the best way to make his NHL debut. Sure right now the Isles fans - all 12 of them - think he's a rockstar but 2 seasons from now he'll be begrudgingly looked at as their version of Cooke/Avery/Carcillo. Is that really a reputation that a boy dreams about earning?

The Penguins Godard leaving the bench was ridiculous. Johnson clearly proved prior that he could handle himself in a fight. But that said I couldn’t imagine the anger, fear and frustration that had developed at that point. Godard should get his mandatory suspension but Bylsma should be left out of it. If you penalize Bylsma you really have to look at the lack of control Capuano had over his team too. No one left the bench but just about every Islander was out of control. I believe Crawford took a hit (fine) for Bertuzzi's actions - the league should consider depleting Capuano's pocketbook for the Martin sucker punch too. That is if they feel like being consistent and making a statement that may stop this from happening in the future.

Come on NHL, let's put a stop to the time warp. Maybe everything old should not be new again.

The Sami Salo Cloud

The Canucks just wrapped up a 5-game road trip with 3 losses and 2 of them were shutouts. Sole ownership of the number 1 spot in the league is gone for the moment. And if we’re being honest, Luongo let in some weak ones in the 4-3 loss to the Avs.

So is the streak over? Are we sliding into a slump? No and no.

As of today the Canucks are tied with the Flyers in points but sit #2 in the league standings. And that Avalanche loss was in OT which means Bobby Lu has not lost in regulation since December 5, 2010. He’s also improved in shootouts and has stopped the two penalty shots he’s faced this season. All that is happening here is that a white-hot team is currently only red-hot.

But that doesn’t mean we Canucks fans have nothing to worry about.

There is a dark, ominous cloud that hangs over the Vancouver franchise and its name is Sami Salo.

If Sami “Made of Glass” Salo steps on the ice for a game the Canucks are in salary cap hell. Keeping the Fin means gambling with the emotional and physical dynamics of a winning team. It also means betting on a guy who can’t seem to sneeze without pulling his groin or tie a skate without breaking a finger.

In a perfect world, Salo would waive his No Trade Clause and we’d dump him on someone else. When Salo is healthy he is great so someone could get a solid game or two out of him, I’m sure. But you can’t trade a player who is not on the active roster and to get him on that roster we have to make salary room. It’s a really nasty dilemma.

It seems like the only option is to mess with the roster of a team that San Jose Sharks head coach Todd McLellan recently called “Complete”.

If we have no other option, who goes?

Juice
For the last couple of years no matter the situation, if a trade seemed necessary every Vancouverite, journalist, analyst screamed “Bieksa!” I’m beginning to think it’s because it’s just such a fun name to say. And honestly, I don’t know a girl who wouldn't want to be screaming his name (but maybe not for trade reasons).

Now though, Bieksa has adequately pulled himself out of a point/performance slump and his name seems to be off the trade table. This is a good thing because I would also argue that he’s a solid member of the emotional core of the team and probably contributes off-ice in ways we are unaware of no matter his plus/minus. And on behalf of the female fan contingent I must also point out he is currently the best-looking Canuck. Every team needs a hottie for female fan morale purposes.

Romtorsson
Haven’t heard of him? That’s because I Bennifered the names of Rome, Torres and Samuelsson – one or more of them may have to be dumped in order to get one old, under-conditioned, injury-prone defensemen back on the bench.

Now there are arguments that Torres is under performing, Samuelsson is past his prime and Rome sucks. But we need to remember that while Torres might be slumping right now, the man has made it to a Stanley Cup final so he knows what’s required. If he lets Kesler and the Sedins perform now and he picks it up in March, when the twins have repeatedly fallen asleep, I’m okay with that.

Samuelsson is definitely under performing at the moment, however last year Samuelsson didn’t heat up until the latter part of the year and he was stronger in the playoffs than Kesler and Burrows combined.

Rome. Well, my only argument for Rome is that he is able to stay healthy longer than Salo. Why trade someone who stays relatively healthy for someone who completely does not?

The Expensive Hip Check
Ballard is really not living up to his hype or his paycheck. Yeah, the hip checks are entertaining but not that entertaining. Then again, Ballard, like Rome, is currently healthy and likely to stay that way longer than Salo. And for a team that hollered about being plagued with injuries when they went down yet again to the Hawks in the playoffs…. They might live to regret trading him.

Last Year’s Whipping Boy
I can’t believe I’m saying this but trading Alberts would be a bad idea. The defensemen, who was the well-deserved butt of fan jokes everywhere last year, has really picked up his game. He’s hitting, he’s grinding and he’s generally – finally – making more positive plays than negative. Yes, he still skates as fast as geriatric, bloated Big Bird, but as Mason Raymond’s performance lately has shown, speed isn’t everything.

And then there was “E”
Ehrhoff could be seen as a logical trade on paper because his contract is up next year and the Canucks will likely not have the financial means to hold onto him. But that’s exactly why we should keep him. Because he’s brilliant and worth way more than we’re paying. And he’s been a key, integral part of the core players that have worked hard over the last couple of years and gotten the Canucks where they are right now.

It feels like a lose-lose situation. If Salo doesn’t sneeze and rupture his last good ball, or hang a picture in his house and put a nail through his hand, we’re pretty much up the salary cap creek without a paddle.

The team that got us to the top of the league may not be the team that enters the playoff race. And that worries me much more than a 2-2-1 road trip.

Winter Classic was a Wash

I appreciate the idea of the Winter Classic. On paper it’s a beautiful concept. 2 National Hockey League teams bringing the game back to its simplest form. A wholesome tribute to the roots of the sport. So why do I feel ripped off, cheapened and frustrated after watching it?

After a long sleepless night these are the top three reasons I could come up with.

I’m Just a Hockey Commissioner Standing in Front of a Country Asking It to Love Us
Gary Bettman and the NHL make it glaringly clear that they don’t care about the roots of the sport. They aren’t trying to display the beauty of hockey in its simplest form. What they are trying to do is make America watch more hockey. The Winter Classic isn’t for the fans. It’s for the non-fans. Because Gary Bettman wants Hockey to be America’s Game, not Canada’s because Americans mean more money. This is why you will never see a Canadian team in the Classic – Canadians already watch hockey and NBC isn’t going to buy the rights to a Canadian dust up.

I fully understand that money needs to be made to keep the league going but I also think that good authentic hockey is enjoyable and viewable and can make the NHL that money, no matter which teams are playing. The Commissioner of the National Hockey League clearly doesn’t have that kind of faith in hockey. He obviously believes that the only way to attract new American fans is to highlight “American” teams and sensationalize and dramatize the crap out of it with slick advertising and an HBO documentary. (Have to give him props on the HBO thing because 24/7 is amazing. He, inadvertently I’m sure, made true hockey fans very happy with that).

Maybe what Bettman and the NHL spin doctors should be working on is educating Americans to the fact that just because a team is based in the USA doesn’t mean the players on that team are American.

When Canada won Men's Hockey Gold I had an American friend from California say “Yeah well you did it with our players. Most of your team is from San Jose and Doughty is from LA.” Clearly the NHL should teach future US fans that you can watch a Canadian team and still find an American to root for.

Is it impossible to think that if Bettman let a Classic between the Vancouver Canucks and the Montreal Canadians happen that NBC wouldn’t be able to twist out some American Dream story about Ryan Kesler or Brian Gionta? By the way the Canadiens have more Americans (6) on their roster than the Washington Capitals (5) and only 1 less than the Penguins (7).

Yes, Ovie and Crosby are a rivalry and I get making them a Winter Classic once, but the Pens have been in this New Year’s Day game twice. And a Canadian team has never been in it.

A Winter Classic between Montreal and Boston could beautifully highlight the history of the NHL, the roots of the game, and bring the emotion and conviction of a true, honest, lifelong rivalry into the homes of Americans.

Never Dumb It Down For Your Audience, Even If they Voted For Bush - Twice
I have American relatives and American friends and I know that there’s a pretty large amount of US citizens that are not as dumb as a puck. After watching NBC’s coverage of the Classic, I am insulted for them. Well, to be completely honest, I only watched about 7 minutes of the NBC broadcast. I changed the channel from NBC to CBC right after the NBC announcer said “Sidney Crosby… from Nova Scotia. You’ll notice a C on his jersey. That means Captain.”

Even if I could let that go – which I really, really can’t – the constant tweets about the craptastic camera angles NBC was showing would have had me switch feeds. The Top Tweet when you click on the WinterClassic hashtag is this from HockeyBacon: “I’ll admit the Winter Classic is great for hockey because it attracts the non-fan. For instance, the guy who is directing the NBC cameras.”

I mean seriously, did NBC want to air this or did they lose a bet? Cuz they clearly dialed it in.

Americans are a sports-loving nation. They understand what a penalty is, a team Captain, a goalie and they know the guys in black and white are called referees. Hockey is unique in a lot of ways but the basics of the game isn’t much different than lots of other sports. Give them some credit. They didn’t need a colorful circle around the puck and they don’t need blimp-views with ant-sized players.

America Wants You to Hug It Out, Bitch
By hyping it to no end and making the Winter Classic into this dramatic, sensationalized monstrosity the new, and the old and stupid, fans of hockey believed that this was more than just a regular season NHL game. But it wasn’t. It’s not the playoffs or the Stanley Cup Final. It’s just a game that happened to be played in a different location than the usual arena. It still counts in the season’s standings.

I bring this up because people were losing their minds on the Penguins for not shaking hands at the end of the game. But NO ONE shakes hands at the end of a regular season game. If you’ve read my blog it’s fairly clear I am a Sidney Crosby fan. But even if the Pens had won I wouldn’t expect anyone to shake hands.

Repeat after me folks “It’s a regular season game”

If it was exhibition, or All-Star or Playoffs shake hands, high five, hug it out, whatevs. But the Penguins just lost 2 points at home, affecting their standing and ultimately possibly their playoff ranking. If Ovechkin and his Capitals had shook hands with every team that beat them – or even one team that beat them – during their 8-game losing streak then you’d have a case. But you don’t.

Repeat after me, “It’s a regular season game.”

And for all those incredibly mature grown men out there who spent last night calling him Cindy Crosby and screaming that “He” didn’t shakes hands, media outlets around the world – even Washington – acknowledge that NEITHER team attempted to shake hands. Crosby doesn’t control the universe, you just think he does.

The teams that played the 2011 Winter Classic were the first to have a true, strong established rivalry and the game ended in a very tense state. If there had been a bench brawl I wouldn’t have been surprised. No one wants to shake hands after that. If you're that traumatized by it, see a therapist.

In the end the only thing I’ll miss about the Winter Classic is the HBO 24/7 Road to the Winter Classic show. The rest of it from- the hype, the game, the handshake and most definitely the ice - was a wash.

Bandwagoner? Realist? Delusional? What fan are you?

This could be a blog that applies to many different NHL teams – maybe other sports as well. But it is most definitely a topic that hits hard in the city of Vancouver because the true fans of the Canucks are very big on labelling and critising Bandwagon fans. My problem is that I don't think the majority of them actually understand what a bandwagoner is.

Bandwagoners sprout up during the spring when Canucks, more often than not, screech into the playoffs in some sort of dramatic fashion. They either slide in ass backwards by the skin of their teeth or they conquer everything in their path. Either way all of a sudden every car in Vancouver has a Canucks flag waving from its window. Every pedestrian is wearing a team jerseys and every dog is in a Canucks shirt (or is that just my dog?!)

I love the Canucks. I watch every game I am able to. Last year I spent roughly $1700 on tickets to games. I bought pay per view games. I tweet games (concretefluff), all Canucks news and write this blog. But when we re-signed the Twins my tweet was: “Canucks re-signed the Sedin twins. I hope they also bought stock in Red Bull to keep them awake during the playoffs.”

Some “fans” labeled me a bandwagoner.

When I tweeted recently that I was skipping the Phoenix-Vancouver game because I was going to a movie and would rather be disappointed by Bruce Willis than Roberto Luongo, I was again labeled a bandwagoner.

Guess what, that’s not Bandwagonning, that’s called REALISM.

I grew up in Montreal. Raised a Habs fan. Bandwagoners do not exist there. In Montreal there are only 2 types of fans - Canadiens fans and Habs fans. End of story.

A lot of bloggers and tweeters were really ticked off when Montreal Fans at the Bell center booed Carey Price the first couple of games this season. But that's what realistic fans do! If Habs fans are pissed at the team, or one or all of its members, they let the world know. But they never ever jump ship. (Even when we say we will, like I did when they traded Halak. I didn’t. But I did boo Price and I’ll do it again when he completely melts down in the spring).

Bandwagoners don’t even get on the ship until they can see the destination from the portside window. You never hear a hockey word come out of their mouths until the snow melts and the Cherry blossoms bloom. They try to participate in playoff conversations by saying stuff like “Number fourteen scored a sweet hat trick last night.” Number 14?! FYI his name is BURROWS, he was born in Pincourt, Quebec and spends the off-season in Kirkland and his wife's name is Nancy - got it, Bandwagoner?

Just because a fan can fully and freely admit that the Sedins fall asleep in the playoffs, Kesler is the Queen of near missed shots and Bieksa spends a great deal of the season coasting on his good looks and sparkling personality does NOT make them a bandwagoner. A bandwagoner wouldn’t know any of that.

I soldier through the season – the whole season – with the team. Celebrating their wins and commiserating their loses. But I’m a realist. As much as I want, pray, wish and dream of the Vancouver Canucks winning the Stanley Cup, I can also understand that it’s probably not going to happen with Alain Vigneault at the helm.

The fans who plan the parade route after 2 consecutive wins in October, who swear every August that “This is our year” and are shocked, truly shocked and devastated, every April when we inevitably shit the bed, those may be true fans as well but they are also delusional fans. Not Shockingly they're the first ones to point their foam fingers and label people who don't drink their team coloured Kool-Aid "bandwagoners".

In the end, I honestly don’t care what you call me. I am what I am. I’ll be there when the Vancouver Canucks finally win the Stanley Cup and I’ll be there every single time they fail miserably too.

2010-2011 Playoff Predictions

Okay, this is it. I’ve consulted my tarot cards, my magic eight ball, my lucky Chihuahua foot and sacrificed a goat (don’t worry San Fermin friends, it’s not the goat from Pamplona).

And here it is. My predictions for the 2010-2011 NHL Season.

EASTERN DIVISION FINAL CONFERENCE STANDINGS
New Jersey Devils
Washington Capitals
Pittsburgh Penguins
Buffalo Sabres
Florida Panthers
Boston Bruins
New York Rangers
Toronto Maple Leafs
Philadelphia Flyers
Montreal Canadiens
Ottawa Senators
Tampa Bay Lightning
Atlanta Thrashers
New York Islanders
Carolina Hurricanes

RATIONALE:
I know, I love to watch them fail too, but the Toronto Maple Leafs are actually going to see the benefits of Brian Burke’s hard, smart work this year. A full season with JS Giguere will help as will the addition of Phaneuf and Versteeg. The Rangers will make the cut this year, as long as Gaborik isn’t sidelined by injuries. The Pens will continue rely on the Russian Frankenstein, Evgeni Malkin and the Canada’s Golden Child (and my not-so secret crush) Sidney Crosby. The Devils will be the only surprise here. They’ll not only do well (they always do well) but this year they’ll take top honours with the help of Kovalchuk, Jason Arnott, Patrick Elias and Olympic Silver medallist Zach Parise. In not surprising news, Pierre Gauthier’s gamble on Price won’t payoff. Despite the best efforts of Gionta, Gomez and the gang, the Canadiens won’t come close to the playoffs this year.


WESTERN DIVISION FINAL CONFERENCE STANDINGS
Detroit Red Wings
Vancouver Canucks
Chicago Blackhawks
San Jose Sharks
Los Angeles Kings
St. Louis Blues
Phoenix Coyotes
Calgary Flames
Anaheim Ducks
Minnesota Wild
Colorado Avalanche
Nashville Predators
Columbus Blue Jackets
Edmonton Oilers
Dallas Stars

RATIONALE:
Shocked? I know a lot of people think the Bad News Bears story of the Phoenix Coyotes last year was a One Hit Wonder thing but I disagree. Maybe the limbo state of their club gives them a chance to focus more on hockey and less on hockey politics. Whatever the reason they work harder than most and it will pay off again. Vancouver’s acquisition of Malholtra will be a key in their success and I see Torres also making a big positive impact. The Flames are angry about last season and that’ll be enough to push them into playoff ranks. The Kings young, fresh line up will only be made stronger by vetran Willie Mitchell, if he stays healthy, and they have 2 solid goaltenders in Joanathan Quick and Jonathan Bernier.

ROUND ONE EAST:
Devils over Leafs – this will be easy.
Capitals over Rangers – not as easy but still not hard
Penguins over Bruins – quick and easy.
Panthers over Sabres – the upset.

ROUND ONE WEST:
Wings over Flames – but Calgary puts up a fight.
Canucks over Coyotes – I see this being easy.
Hawks over Blues – Halak won’t be able to do it all himself this year.
Kings over Sharks – the biggest surprise and longest fight of the round.

SEMI FINALS EAST:
Devils over Panthers – not a hard series.
Penguins over Capitals – It’s a simple case of good over evil. Superman over Lex Luthor. Hot over Ugly. Crosby over Ovehckin.

SEMI FINALS WEST:
Wings over Kings – It won’t be easy though.
Canucks over Hawks - FINALLY! With the C off Luongo’s back – and Dustin Byfuglien out of his playoff crease he’s bound to finally live up to his hype – and paycheck.

EAST CON FINALS:
Devils over Penguins – I heart you Sid, but this isn’t going to be your year (again).

WEST CON FINALS:
Canucks over Wings – 7 nailbiting games but Vancouver will prevail.

STANLEY CUP PLAYOFFS:
Canucks over Devils.

Canuck’s goalie bailed out Team Canada when the Devil’s goalie melted down. Brodeur is on his last legs. With the “C” off Luongo’s back, he’s bound to finally fully live up to his hype – and paycheck. And after 40 years of failure…. Vancouver will finally do it.

Please keep in mind that I’m a Canucks-Habs fan so for me to predict anyone else would be ridiculous. The Habs made moves so stupid even I can’t pretend they’ll succeed this year, but Vancouver – even with the GM from Hell, Mike Gillis – are making smarter moves. They’ve kept a core of solid performers together and added Torres, Malholtra and Schneider is ready to be a solid back-up goalie. If we don’t have it this year, it’ll be another 40 years.

The "C" word

So Vancouver's beloved LUUUUUUU gave up the big "C". If your shocked by this, you're an idiot. The media was buzzing after last season that it should be removed but Gillis - the General Manager from hell - had always said the decision would be Luongo's. And Monday before training camp Luongo gave up the "C". He told reporters; "I enjoyed the experience. It was fun. I took a lot of pride in it, and that was one of the main reasons it was tough for me to come to this decision."

Mike Gillis, GM from H, of course said that Bobby Lou made the right decision and Luongo can now solely focus on winning instead of dealing with heightened pressure and expectations.

Yipee.

I'm not hopeful that this'll improve the Vancouver Canucks chances at winning a Stanley Cup but that's because I don't blame the goalie for the perpetual Playoff meltdowns. I think it has more to do with Vingeault's coaching style, Gillis bad decisions off the ice (I'm looking at you Andrew Alberts) and the coma nap that the Canucks defense and the Sedin twins take every year.

All this really does - IMO - is give the future Captain a chance to blame the goalie.

And who is that future Captain of the Vancouver Canucks? Nobody knows yet.

Other teams tend to let the players vote on the Captain position. When Roberto Luongo was given the "C" it was the sole decision of Coach Vingeault and GM (from Hell) Gillis. No one has explained how the new Captain will be chosen. Personally I think it should be voted on by the players but knowing Gillis he'll make the decision himself, and screw it up again.

Since he can't make his decisions, I will make mine. Let's talk about the players who are rumored to be in the running.

First off we have newbie Canucks Dan Hamhuis and Manny Malholtra. Their names are running around in the rumor mill because they're "league veterans". But they aren't Canuck veterans. If they haven't proven themselves with the team or with the fans of that team they shouldn't have the "C". End of story.

Other potentials include Ryan Kesler. Seriously?! Gillis is going to make a 25 year old hot-head, with a reputation of being a diva and a baby Captain? Why not give it to Burrows then? Or Shane O'Brien? Princess Kesler makes about as much sense. Forget it.

Think I'm wrong? Put it this way, just before the Olympic gold medal hockey game a reporter asked a bunch of the Canucks which of their teammates they wanted to see grab the gold. Kevin Bieksa's told the reporter he wanted to see Luongo win and not just because he was Canadian, but because Kesler was his roommate on the road and he would be INTOLERABLE with a gold medal.

I'm betting that applies to a "C" on his jersey too.

Another rumor - the twins.

Personally I think Henrik or Daniel Sedin are solid choices. I lean more towards Henrik because I think he's come out of his shell more in the last few years. Especially with the goal streak. He's learned to be articulate and he's handled the spotlight just fine. And I know people moan that the Swedish are too quiet to be Captain, (Marcus Naslund blah, blah, blah) But do we really need a loud mouth? If Gillis and Vingeault get their act together then the Canucks' actions on the ice won't need so much explaining/apologizing off the ice.

My other choices, that the rumor mill is ignoring, are Kevin Bieksa and Mikael Samuelsson.

Bieksa is comfortable speaking publicly and I personally think he's a good player and hello, eye candy. If the Canucks are going to turtle again this season at least give me something pretty to look at. I know that he's rumored to be traded - like every 5 minutes - but keep him and give him the "C" trade someone ugly instead.

Samuelsson doesn't have any issue speaking his mind - just ask the Swedish Olympic hockey team he was left off of. He's blunt, to the point and honest. We need that. Nothing annoys me more than Captains that pussyfoots around stuff. Also, he's been a pretty strong, solid force on the Canucks. He's got grit. He's got a voice. What's the problem here?

And last but not least, they could always give it to Sammi Salo since he's always injured he'll have lots of time to address any questions the world might have! And then at least we'd be paying him to do something other than hobble around on crutches.

If you're uncertain why I think Mike Gillis is the GM from Hell, because our tanking and his bad decisions (like Alberts, giving Luongo the C, etc) aren't enough. Here is further proof: At the press conference, Gillis hinted that the Canucks could start the season without a Captain.

It's that hard a decision for the idiot? Really? Again, just leave it up to the players.

My prediction is if we start a season without a Captain, we won't even MAKE the playoffs. The Canucks are a very emotional team and they need a centre from the get-go.

I also predict if Gillis doesn't pick a Captain before the season starts then he's waiting so that Hamhuis and Malholtra can play a few - so they can appear to earn the "C" he'll give one of them.

If he picks a Captain before the start of the season, I'm betting it's Kesler. Because it would be the wrong choice and I don't see Gillis ever making a right one.

Who should it be? Henrik Sedin or Samuelson.

Guess we can do nothing but wait.

(If I'm right about any of my predictions then I'll be setting up a 1-900 Psychic Hotline. Feel free to ask me anything... for a $1.99 a minute, of course.)